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yes, there are still some good ones by Scott C. Holstad
published in Volume 6, Issue 1 on March 1st, 1999

i went to the Seal Beach McDonald's
today for an early lunch,
approached the counter and anally
ordered the usual double cheese,
ketchup mustard only, large fries,
straw shaker, and the girl behind
the register looked at me w/ barely
contained hostility, but began to
write the order, before relaying it
in Spanish to the crew behind her.
knowing it would take quite awhile,
i stepped back and began perusing the
sports page when i noticed an old
street bum shuffling toward the
counter, mumbling madly to himself
and anyone who would care to listen.
shit, i thought, this old coot's
gonna make a damn fool nuisance of
himself and get kicked out (this
particular mickey dees was in a
fairly posh area) and, damn, if
he didn't shuffle on up to the girl
at the register and strain to ask
for a cup of coffee. the girl got
her manager to come over and i
cringed as he approached the old man,
but he said, "hey Eddie, how're ya
doing?" the bum muttered something
in reply & the manager said, "coffee
huh, you know how much that's gonna
costya, dont'cha Eddie?" Eddie nodded
and pulled out two dirty pennies from
his trouser pocket, then slowly handed
them to the mgr. i held my breath,
then watched as the mgr carefully rang
up a 2 coffee sale, handed over a cup
of the stuff & said, "see you tomorrow"
as the old man shuffled off.

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